I will preface this entry by saying this: it is long. After putting my heart, mind and many hours into it, what is written below is what needs to be. I believe it’s a story worth reading.
I especially encourage any Newport Coast Lighthouse Church members and attenders, past or present to read it. If you come to NCL, please read it before Sunday. If you come to NCL, please be there Sunday too.
The subject matter is very timely, and it couldn’t be more dear to my heart. It’s about Tyler, of course.
Tyler, who is being ordained this Sunday at church. Tyler, who is becoming a pastor.
And this is how he’s been becoming one:
Tyler and I met in 2008, months after we had both graduated from college. Same state, different schools, same mutual friend, Sean Sullivan, who I am forever indebted to for being born on May 13 and having a handful of friends - including Tyler, including myself - get together to celebrate on a night that changed my life.
The way Tyler and I each describe how we felt when we met is the same. There was attraction and excitement. There was surety and peace. There wasn’t the worry or pressure to force something to happen. We knew it was already happening and that whatever was to come would find us together. It was the dream I never really had come true because it exceeded anything I ever dreamed I deserved. It was orchestrated by God and continues to be. This is why it’s real.
Most of the details of our lives were uncertain at the time, but there were 2 of which we were sure: we wanted to do whatever God wanted us to do, and we wanted to do that together.
A few weeks after meeting we were dating. A few months after dating we were engaged. A few months after being engaged (2 to be exact) we were married. We didn’t want to spend any more time apart. So we didn’t.
Of all the things we had learned leading up to when we met, what prevailed was the truth that the answers we needed would be found in God. We didn’t know what that would look like, but we knew we could trust Him.
We also knew we needed jobs.
Tyler has a gift and passion for photography. He also has a degree in it. So the search began for him to find a job using it. He applied and interviewed for a position at Hurley. With his love for surfing as well, this seemed perfect. We hoped he’d get hired, and I thought for sure he would. But he didn’t. He applied for other jobs in photography but the search wasn’t fruitful. The desire, qualifications and need was there. The job for him wasn’t.
A few years earlier, Tyler’s dad Jeff had quit his job as a businessman to pursue the call to become a pastor. He was a successful salesman, but the Lord revealed a different plan. While Tyler was in college Jeff started a church called Newport Coast Lighthouse. The church met in an elementary school cafeteria. Tyler attended when he was in town and led worship from time to time.
Knowing the skills Tyler had and the needs of the church, Tyler’s dad offered him a job to work there. The church staff was small, and it only took a handful of people to run the business side of things. Jeff needed assistance in areas he thought Tyler could be helpful.
The job offer was received with mixed emotions. Tyler needed a job, but working for his dad was not what he envisioned. Working at a church wasn’t either. It took time and consideration, but we decided he should take the job. It was a step of faith to say the least, but he was faithful to fulfill the opportunity and need.
Time proved the job at the church was a good fit for Tyler. He used his graphic design knowledge to build and maintain the website and media needs, which were consistent. Sunday was the busiest work day as he managed the setting up and breaking down of the church. He also was a worship leader, taking care of everything that entails. Any work Pastor Jeff needed help with was done by Tyler. Their father-son relationship was already solid, and working together went well.
After college and before marrying me, Tyler spent time living in Ireland. An Irish friend named John lived in a little coastal town called Lahinch and was the only Christian there. His heart was to show Jesus to others by the example of his life. He asked Tyler to come there to do the same.
Tyler taught surf lessons at John’s surf school and became part of the Lahinch community. John started a home Bible study, asking Tyler to lead worship and teach from time to time. Teaching was new for Tyler, and he was reluctant to do it. But he was faithful to fulfill the opportunity and need.
Living in Lahinch was a pivotal experience for Tyler. The Lord gave him a taste of what it’s like to genuinely serve Him, to live life as a godly example to the people around. It was here Tyler felt his purpose. It was here the Lord stirred his gifts.
Tyler had been working at NCL church for some time, and we were in our first year of marriage. Along with his regular duties, Tyler was becoming a consistent student of the Bible. Something he did then and does still is wake up early and read. I’ve always admired this, especially since I’ve never been able to be consistent in it myself. But he is, and his diligence is inspiring. It’s also fruitful.
Along with being faithful in his devotional time, Tyler frequently wrote short devotionals. He had a knack for conveying what the Lord had shown him in his study time in ways that were clear, interesting, accurate and good. I recognized his gift right away and could tell the Lord was doing something special with his committed study time. God really does reward those who diligently seek Him. Through this He communicates our purpose. Tyler was learning this firsthand.
I remember well the first time Tyler taught at our church. He had been on staff at NCL for almost a year. At that time Pastor Jeff had encouraged church members who felt led to share a brief testimony of what the Lord had done in their life, allotting time for one person to share each Sunday morning before the sermon. When Tyler told his dad what the Lord was urging him to share, Pastor Jeff knew it shouldn’t be brief. He told Tyler to prepare his testimony as a teaching for the Sunday service. So he did. And it blew me away.
While finding our worth should never be based on the praises of man, encouragement can be a good thing. Many people were moved by Tyler’s teaching. Suddenly I wasn’t the only one recognizing his gift. It was clear the Lord had placed something inside Tyler that needed to be cultivated and used. Pastor Jeff saw this too and asked Tyler to teach again a few months later.
As he felt in Ireland, there was reluctance. There was doubt in his ability, fear in his inadequacy. What he knew for sure was the Lord was speaking to him. If God wanted to speak through him as well, Tyler was willing to be that vessel. He studied and prepared. He was faithful to fulfill the opportunity and need.
Tyler’s second time teaching at church was a blessing to many, but not to everyone. A board member of the church expressed concern to Pastor Jeff. What were Tyler’s qualifications? Where was his theological training? His ordination? His gray hair? Was his opportunity to teach given to him by God or by his dad?
The church board met and these issues were addressed. Pastor Jeff did not waiver in his confidence that the Lord had given Tyler a gift. As head of the church, he would encourage this gift to be stirred when their was an opportunity and need. His view was backed by Scripture. Mere preference and opinion would not hinder the work God was doing in Tyler.
Months passed and Tyler was asked to teach a third time at church on a Sunday Pastor Jeff was going to be out of town. The same board member urged his pastor to hire someone qualified to teach. Pastor Jeff assured him he already had.
I was at work when Tyler called me in tears. I didn’t have a break, but I stepped outside to take the call. He sounded shattered. He had just learned that the board member who voiced concern against him teaching had left our church. He and his wife, his kids and their families all decided to leave. Of course they had their reasons, but the weight was on Tyler. The doubt he felt and the inadequacy he feared was confirmed. He felt responsible for our church’s loss.
It took time to learn that a loss like that is really a gain.
Though rumors came back to us that the Gipe’s had taken over NCL, that nepotism had gotten the best of Pastor Jeff, God’s work did not stop, and neither did our church. God’s plan for unity in the body (beautifully spelled out in Ephesians 4) is much stronger than the enemy’s plan to divide it. God’s promise to work all things out for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose was proven true here as it is time and time again.
A few years after Tyler’s first teaching experience at our church, we both felt a prompting from the Lord for him to attend the School of Ministry, a 2 year program from Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa. From 2011 to 2013 I watched as Tyler invested all the extra time he had into biblical studies, deepening his relationships with others, with me, with God. He grew leaps and bounds in things of eternal importance, things that matter most.
While many people enter the School of Ministry with intentions of leaving as a pastor ready to plant a church, Tyler’s goal was not the same. It was just the next available step to keep his God-given gifts growing and refined. He was faithful to fulfill the opportunity and need.
It’s been 5 years since Tyler’s been on staff at NCL. He has served and worked here faithfully as his occupation and ministry. It’s not an easy job, though it may appear to be at times. He’s dealt with comments and comparisons from “real jobs” with “real hours”. There have even been times he’s wondered if they’re right. His commitment to be consistent where consistency isn’t required of anyone else is challenging but honorable. He does work that often goes unnoticed, but that doesn’t keep him from pressing on. For all the times it’s discouraging, it’s rewarding still.
You can trust He is seeking the Lord every day. You can pray with him anytime, he wants to pray for you. He loves the Word and lives it out. If there’s anything about his role you want to know, just ask.
Though he works full time at the church, Tyler is an amazing photographer. It will always be a hobby and hopefully an extra income. We are grateful when Gipe Photography gets work, and you won’t beat our church family discount :)
It’s been 5 years since I married Tyler. Year after year I’ve watched as he’s become the man God intended him to be, fulfilling one opportunity and need at a time. With lots of faith. Lots of let downs. The doubts and fears still come, but their defeat by God’s prevailing purpose is sure. I’ve listened to Tyler teach at our church, at high schools, at youth groups and more. His words carry power, authenticity and truth because he speaks only what he has received. His studying is diligent - he’s still early to rise. He seeks wisdom, not glory, but encouragement is always welcomed. He’s learned people come and go, but he will keep after God’s will till the day he hears well done.
He’s hearing it now from me. From his pastor - his co-laborer and father. From his church family and friends.
Tyler, your faithfulness to the Lord’s calling on your life to be a mouthpiece for Him has blessed me and many others. It is bearing much fruit the way God wants it to. It is your purpose, clear and true. Like our love, this ministry has been orchestrated by God and continues to be. This is why it’s real.
I’m grateful to witness it. I’m proud to call you my pastor. I’ll always be by your side. Well done my love.
“And I will give you shepherds after My own heart, who will feed you with knowledge and understanding.” Jeremiah 3:15
